Sunday, 22 December 2013

Tangle Resolved


        You are in a relation with the person you love the most. Things are good and rosy in the beginning but are you finding hard to be in the relation now? Has your relation turned sour with time? Do you think the fire in your relation has extinguished? Then you need to focus on small things. The below listed are some of the small errors committed by many people which mess up their relations.Don't let your relation die on these simple errs instead work on them and bring back the blossom in your dying relation.
Image Courtsey: Google Images


Expectations:

     Most people in a relation do expect a lot of things from their partner. When those expectations do not get fulfilled people start to feel they are with the wrong person. This messes up most of the relations. You should expect reasonable things from your partner and not unreasonable ones. Give your partner some space of his own. Let your partner know what you need only then can the person start to fulfill your expectations. And even after telling, this does not happen don’t consider your partner unfit. Give it some time, its new for that person also. Expect as minimal as you can, you will realize you are happier that way.


Space:

    Some people become stalker when they get into a relation. Following every move your partner makes, where that person goes and whom he meets, who calls him and whom he calls are all classic features of a stalker partner. Badgering your partner for every detail and calling him at all times can get you under the person’s nerves. So stop the stalker within yourself and give your partner some space. Let him tell you what’s going on. Some times it’s better to wait for your partner to tell stuff to you, instead of you asking all the time.


Trust:

    Keep trust on your partner. I know it sounds cliché but trust is one of the main factors of a healthy relation. Keep telling your partner that you trust him. Especially when you know he is lying. This will make him feel guilty within and eventually would bring himself to tell u the truth. (Trust me, this technique works). It will also prevent him from telling any lies to you in future. You should also believe your partner when he tells you certain things, questioning always is not a right thing to do. This will make your partner also understand that you do believe and trust him, which will definitely bring a smile to his face.


Listening:

    Be a better listener, than a better talker. I do feel that most relations get tangled up due to the lack of listening abilities. Listen to your partner when he or she speaks something important, let him finish than express your opinions. Nobody likes to get interrupted, so why to do that. Listen to any explanations given by your partner in case he has done a thing which has disappointed you. There will be a reason behind that action. Hear it out first and then make a decision.


Discuss:

    Discussion is a main factor of any relation. Don’t do a thing or make a decision and then discuss with your partner. Instead do the opposite. Discuss all the matters concerning you with your partner. What he thinks about it, is also important. Not discussing things with your partner will make him feel underestimated and hence this will start the problems.


Let Go and Say Sorry:

    You fought with your beloved on a small thing and you both are upset and angry about it. “I will not say sorry” this is what you tell yourself. There is a possibility that your partner is also thinking the same. What will happen if you both let your egos come in between, whenever you fight? You won’t be happy for a long time. Letting go and saying sorry is one of the things you should never forget when in a relation. A simple sorry won’t make you small it will make miracles happen. So next time you fight with your partner take a minute to yourself and then tell him “It’s ok, sh*t happens”.


I Love You! :

    Do tell your partner how much you love him. Never think one time is enough. To know at regular times that your partner loves you is the most heartwarming feeling. Most people don’t do this once their relation has reached a certain level. This is the reason that spark in the relation disappears. Show your love not only through words but by actions also.


        Relations are something which doesn’t happen every day and when they do, we should preserve them for times to come. Don’t let go of that special someone who has entered in your life just because of a few errors made here there. Relations that once break can never be mended. So why let it break ?


"The only real security is not in owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting, not in hoping, even. Security in a relationship lies neither in looking back to what it was, nor forward to what it might be, but living in the present and accepting it as it is now".
Anne Morrow Lindbergh 


Friday, 13 December 2013

The Little Magician

In a blink of an eye a zillion things change. Change a word that has the power to turn things in a way they never were. A lot of things cross our minds when we hear this dynamic word. There are so many reactions to a change. It has such power that it can gather an attention of millions at once but also has the ability to conceal the paths from which it creeps into. It has a magical power which shows its magic as soon as it puts its step forth. This little magician is very clever, it has its hawk eyes set on all things and the second it gets an opportunity, it creeps in and shows its magic.

                The idiosyncrasy of this little magician can be seen as having no physical tangible appearance. Its display changes every minute, every second. It stares us with its huge eyes but our poor naked eyes can’t see it.

                The growth and life cycle of change is just like that of Homo sapiens. Initially it has a tiny identification or existence somewhere. Slowly it develops but still hard to notice; its growth is such that though some people recognise it they can hardly say for sure whether it’s ‘the change’. This is the reason, this little magician gets the ground to grow more & more and like a malady it spreads to wherever it possibly can. And the day comes when its existence hits people hard on their faces. I wonder if that’s the reason most of the people on earth have an aversion towards change.

Yes, we don’t like change and wish it never interfered with the way of things. Most of us don’t like change, (at least with the good things). But if we dig deeper we would realize that change (as they call It) is not the spice of life, it’s actually (as I call it) the salt of life. Yes, it does sound funny “it’s not food” you’d say. Change is the salt, it adds flavor to that boring life which you are sick of living every day. As without salt food is not worth consuming, the same goes with change. Without change life would be not worth living. As much as we loathe good things changing it is actually good that it changes. Imagine what would happen to good things if it did not change, the feeling it gave would not give us that cheer it used to. That is because the repetition of anything everyday becomes humdrum. And imagine bad things never changing into good ones (Ah! That feeling is miserable).

                This little magician is not liked by many but it is needed all the time though its need is not realised until it steps forward. So whenever this little magician steps forth don’t be afraid of its unpredictable magic. Just wait till it happens. It would give you a new feeling every time. Be assured that this little magician whenever will brandish its wand will leave you gaping at its magic. You may not like it initially but it will gain your trust slowly and steadily. Change will never cease to show its magic. So why not to embrace it happily?


"Life belongs to the living, and he who lives must be prepared for changes."-Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe 

Sunday, 8 December 2013

Having Parents, Still Orphans?



When I see today’s parents my mind is bombarded with several questions.  Where are those parents who were always there to watch you when you played, who solved your difficult math problems, who taught you dance steps for your annual dance competition? Where are those parents who reprimanded you when you told a lie or stole a fancy thing from your classmate? Those parents who read to you bedtime stories and kissed you goodnight are lost. I have seen those parents but now I can see them no more. It’s like they have hidden under the invisibility cloak

                In the era of instant connection, the connection between the parents and children is lost. In a bid to provide for all the material things to the children, parents work all day and all night; leaving their children with maids or babysitters who are illiterate and don’t care in the least about their child. Those maids or babysitters are people who don’t know a thing about the parents’ culture and about their systems and worst is that most of them are illiterate. Parents who consider those maids lower than themselves in intelligence, status and standards are basically giving them their children to raise. And here I am not talking about the poor or middle class people, here I am talking about those filthy rich people who can easily find time to be with their children and take proper care of them, but sadly they don’t.

Those parents who leave their children when they are sleeping at early dawn and arrive home when they are already put to bed; the only time they spend with them is when they get a holiday. How would those children ever know what parenting is and how parents are with their children? They wouldn’t because their parents are never around. Birth-Givers think that by providing lavish lifestyle and putting children in hi-fi schools they are showing to the world how much they love them. But they are children and not a person whom one can impress with fancy things. They crave for their parents attention and for their time, they want their parents to play with them and to listen to their crazy stories. But alas! They have to play with robotic machines instead.
image courtesy : Google

                             “Your children need your presence more than your presents”. -Anonymous

                The reason behind all the nasty habits and behaviors and silly tantrums, we see in those children when they grow up, is that their parents were never there to teach them what was right and what was wrong. Those parents were busy in their own world when their children started on to the wrong path. These kinds of parents are the one who spoil their own child by their own hands. Spoon feeding them at all times. Instead of punishing the child for getting low marks and hence not getting admission in the college , they would tell their sons and daughters ‘not to worry ,I will get you in’. If they are capable enough to give pocket money to their children then why are they not capable in keeping an eagle’s eye on where they spend that money? Isn’t that necessary? Getting things before the right time comes and getting their problem solved the wrong way, those children do suffer a lot when life tests them. We many times blame people for not handling the situation well, we often tag them as stubborn or selfish this is because they were not brought up properly by their parents, they are not to be blamed.

                Soon I realized that the increase in the number of drug and binge addiction in young adolescent children and teenage girls getting pregnant was the result of negligence on the part of their parents. If they take interest in what their children are doing and where they are going, will such a thing never happen. It’s time for the youth to know that giving one’s child a luxurious lifestyle is not enough. Parents should give their children, parents they actually need and not what they think their children need.

At the end of the day, the most overwhelming key to a child's success is the positive involvement of parents. Jane D. Hull 



Wednesday, 4 December 2013

Get a life, dude!

Get a life, dude!

     Ever happened that the person you loved with all your heart, rejected you? Or didn’t have the same feelings as you did? Or did it ever happen that the person you had a loving relationship with, ended up loving somebody else? Probably yes, it did happen some or the other time in your life. It is definitely world collapsing for many people. Some people do forget the people they loved and move on from a heartbreaking rejection or a horrifying relationship. But for others it is just too hard a pill to swallow.

     Sometimes the person whom we love has no interest in us and tells us so but we still tend to hold on to that person and never move on, in a hope that they would return back. Each passing day we think about that beloved whom the cupid had stuck its arrow on. The rejection gets under our nerves, making us think that we are nothing but losers and no good could ever happen to us. The clouds of depression start to hover above us. Though going through this dark stage some of us still don’t give up. We try to do every possible thing to impress that special someone. In some cases many of us do even win the hearts of our beloved but in most cases the scenario is the opposite.

     A person rejected or dumped needs to understand that they need to stop obsessing about the one they love. To constantly follow that person’s every move on social networking sites or apps or to stalk them via phone or messages or worst even in person would only drag that person astray from us because it is obvious that they don’t need us. This in turn would only hurt us more.

     The best way to get over that feeling of rejection is to look forward in the future and give our life another chance. To stop thinking about what we lost and to start thinking about what we can perhaps gain. Life is short, too short for the gifts it has to offer to us. So why not look on the bright side and give life another chance. Why not to humour ourselves saying “go get a life dude”. There are people who make your life living hell and then there are people who make you think ‘are they angels?’. We all get both kinds of people at some or the other phase of our life. All we need to do is search those angels. They wouldn’t stop coming, then why should we stop looking for them?

     It’s always nice to go to people who are welcoming than to go to those who make faces when they see us. A person who can make us smile is better than a person who makes us cry. Only if we move on, can we find the person who really wants to be with us.
Why to wait for people who never wants us to be in their life? Is the feeling of getting continuously rejected or being hold up greater than the feeling of trying out new things, perhaps trying to know different people who are like us? So we should stop beating our self about being rejected or dumped. Instead get a life which is ever changing and ever challenging and never giving a shit about the dramas it gives us to deal with.

"Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined." -- Thoreau

Monday, 2 December 2013

Are we letting our religion down?


A couple of days back I was surfing the famous social networking site and I read a status on the rape case, scrolling down I read the comments in the curiosity of what people had to say about it . What I found was very appalling for it did not contain comments related to the status. What I found to my complete astonishment was that people were arguing in the name of religion. Each of them typed out some really obnoxious comments about each other's religion and how injustice was meted out on their part. The arguments became intense to such an extent that they started abusing the opposite religion. Now was that right? I asked myself.

Does abusing each other’s religion make ours more dignified? Possibilities are nil. But it most definitely shows that it has not preached us properly, because if it did, people wouldn't be abusing each other's religion. I am no expert in the field of God or God praising but I do know that no religion teaches us such things.


Image Courtsey : Google
Then why in the name of God are we fighting?  To protect one's religion is good, to favor what we have faith in, is also good, but to let it down in front of other religions? No, we possibly wouldn’t think of that. Astonishingly what we deny in our sub-conscious doesn't match our actions in the conscious state of mind. By speaking ill about other religions, we are letting our religion down. Almost all religions in the world emphasize the gains of forgiveness. A simple act of forgiveness can save a hundreds and billions of lives, which are taken in the name of religion. Yes, I do know it is very difficult to forgive somebody who has spoken ill about your faith, your God. But then again doesn't young India like challenges? (Don’t believe me? go watch Roadies audition). Why not to take it as a challenge? If we, the youth in television interviews and on many such occasions say that if given a chance we would change the world, then I say we have the chance Right Now!


My viewpoint doesn't support or oppose any religion or its followers but I, in my ability am trying to bring change to the stagnant mindsets of people. Gone are the days where an eye for an eye was justice. Then why the system still remains in our minds in some or the other way? If we for a second, for a minute do come out of the old mindset and see all religions in a respectable light, then we would surely be a stronger, a better, a united youth.

P.S: I do not intend to ridicule any belief or system related to religion. The above is my personal viewpoint. Any differing viewpoint is always welcomed in the comments section.


First Step

I once heard in a movie "An extraordinary day starts with an ordinary morning." Now isn't that true?
image courtsey: google
For people like Mark Zuckerberg never knew that something as small as a thought or an idea would change his ordinary day into an extraordinary one. Einstein never knew that the morning he devised the relativity formula would change the world of physics in ways that he could not have forseen. Something similar happened to me this morning. I woke up attented my daily mundane chores and as I was doing so, I had an idea to start blogging and I immediately started to look into the ways I could do so (as I was a total alien in the world of blogging). I had never dreamt about blogging untill a few months back when my fellow classmate started blogging which inspired me thoroughly. I always liked writing, but blogging was something far more confidence needing which I always lacked. This morning I forgot about my insecurities of how the world would perceive me as a writer and hopped on to the train of writing.Hardly do I know whether readers would like my posts or not but a woman cant stop hoping,now can she? Starting this blog is my first step into the world where people love to read and write what they like. I have kicked my insecurities into the bin and now really looking forward to write and reflect. Having a new blog has changed my ordinary day into an extraordinary one for sure. 

P.S : I would really like my readers to comment on my posts. Healthy criticism is always welcomed.
 my email id: mybrightdestiny@gmail.com